Do Arranged Marriages and Stockholm Syndrome Share a Connection?
Love by choice or fear?
An arranged marriage is when parents or families pick a life partner for their child. It’s like setting up a date, but for life. This happens in many parts of the world. People do it because they believe families can make a good match.
In these marriages, love might come after marriage, not before. That means the couple might not know each other well before they get married. But, they learn to live and grow together after the wedding. Some people like this idea, while others prefer choosing their partners themselves.
One interesting question that often comes up is about the link between arranged marriages and Stockholm syndrome.
What is Stockholm Syndrome?
Stockholm syndrome is a strange and unexpected reaction some people have when they’re in a scary situation, especially if someone has taken them or is controlling them. Imagine being kidnapped and then, after a while, starting to trust or even like the kidnapper. It might sound odd, but it’s something that has happened to some people.
The name “Stockholm syndrome” comes from an event in Stockholm, Sweden. A long time ago, robbers took some bank workers and held them for several days. Surprisingly, the bank workers began to feel close to and care for the robbers. They even defended them when the police came to save them.
Why does this happen? Experts believe that when people are in danger, they might try to make friends with the person causing the danger. They hope this will keep them safe. It’s a way of coping or dealing with a very tough and frightening situation.
How Are They Alike?
Dependence: Both in arranged marriages and situations leading to Stockholm syndrome, individuals may feel dependent. In an arranged marriage, one might depend on their spouse for emotional and social support, especially if they didn’t know them well before marriage. Similarly, in Stockholm syndrome, a hostage might feel they need to rely on their captor for safety and survival.
Adjusting to Situations: Over time, people in both scenarios might change their feelings. In arranged marriages, couples might grow to love and care for each other, even if they weren’t in love at first. In Stockholm syndrome, the person might develop positive feelings for their captor as a way to make sense of their situation.
Coping Mechanisms: Both situations involve finding ways to cope. In arranged marriages, one might focus on the good aspects of their partner and relationship to make the best of the situation. In Stockholm syndrome, feeling close to the captor might be a way to feel safer or less scared.
How They Are Different?
Arranged marriages and Stockholm syndrome seem similar, but they’re quite different. In arranged marriages, families suggest partners, but the ones getting married often have a choice to say “yes” or “no.” They might grow to love and respect each other, aiming for a happy life together.
Stockholm syndrome, on the other hand, happens when someone is taken without their choice and starts to trust their captor to cope with fear. While arranged marriages can lead to true love and happiness, Stockholm syndrome’s feelings come from a place of fear and aren’t the same as genuine love.
Every arranged marriage has its own story, just as every case of Stockholm syndrome does. It’s always crucial to understand and respect individual experiences.
